Because, now, THEY ARE TO WED And he must ensure that the LiverpoolLondon march ends with the most gigantic protest seen since the war. as no doubt you will know by from now until the summer when they walk down the aisle we will b aclugea will pictures o them: acres of newsprir detailing every acceptable nook and cranny of Enem Haves television spectacular: showing them in all their finery By the (when, incidentally, ficial unemployment figures will be around two and and books OI them, and posters show. ing ineir raalant smiles So, it is time to head for your Royal Marriage Fall-out Shelter.
Don't blame Diana. She isn't exactly broke herself but marryln, him she will be boarding one or ine mickest grav trains in the business.
moment he receives f306,382 a year from us, the tax-payers When he is promoted to the position his mother enjoys he will be getting, on curren then ten times age will of Buckingham Palace (which costs £1,485,000 year Windsor casu £265.912 Holyroo House (£265,912) Ken ington Palace (£483,000) and St James Palace (£763,000).
And then there is his estate, Highgrove Gloucester which we bought for him last year, costing over fl million. Train Visiting all these different homes will be no problem for Diana. She can travel on the royal train (£385,000 a year), the royal airplane (£2,500,000) journey around the coast in the royal yacht (£2m). is in all thisfor you well you may don't spoilsport. look on the orignt side All you chance There will soon be a job yuu. going at the kindergarten you can bet your jubilee she works, mug that won't fall foul Maggie Thatcher's cuts.
But talking of cuts. wasn't it the first King Charles who had his head chopped off? No one surely. not even ind most extreme extremist. the most terrible terrorist would wish that on our present Charles?
The kindest cut of all would be chop the whoie roval lamboree
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NOW is the time to sell your television, stop buying your daily newspaper, and exchange your radio for a six-month sleeping pill.
mean Diana can have the run